


VoltronWatch Crossover

by Helicake752



Category: Overwatch (Video Game), Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Crossover, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Multi, Other, Self-Indulgent, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-11-20 18:23:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11340873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helicake752/pseuds/Helicake752
Summary: Voltron crash lands on earth, but it's not the earth they came from. Crossover fic with Voltron and Overwatch.





	1. Can I Pet Your Cats?

**Author's Note:**

> This is self-indulgent but why else do I write things? Will be sort of long with an attempt at plot but don't hold me to that. Also No editing, no beta, we die like men

Shit. Shit, fuck, ass, balls, damnit. FUUUUUUUUCK. Motherfucking. Bitchtits. 

Lance waxed poetic in his head as a barrage of lasers narrowly zipped over him and Blue, landing a magnificent nut-shot on Voltron. Zarkon was definitely keeping that one for a slo-mo replay later. Hell, Lance was keeping that for the highlight reel.

Focus, Paladin, Blue chided in his head, forcing him back to the fight.

“Haha holy shit,” Pidge’s voice crackled over the comms. “That’d be hilarious literally any other time except now.”

“You’re still laughing,” Hunk pointed out, awkwardly maneuvering The Leg Squad into a pseudo-splits position. 

“Knock it off, you two,” Shiro cut in, “We need to focus on the-”

“Lance, dodge right!” Pidge interrupted. As much as Lance would have loved to, he was, unfortunately, still connected to a hip joint, which meant that in their current experiment with contortionism, there was nowhere to go. Lance grunted as something solid collided with the back of Blue. She hissed in pain, filling Lance with a horrible, buzzing energy. Everyone yelped a little as Voltron skidded a few feet back, tumbling end over end, and landing, as said by the epic poet of the 21st century, Pitbull, face down, ass up.

“Nice one, hot-shot,” Keith muttered sarcastically.

“Hey, shut up, mullet!” Lance retorted. “You try being a leg, it’s not like I can just shoot lasers from my toes like-”

“Look out!” Keith had the nerve to interrupt his snappy-as-fuck comeback as another volley of projectiles honed in on Blue. Voltron executed a very sassy high-kick, and Lance nearly asked Keith and Pidge to clap under him and Blue, for style points. Saving the universe is useless without some flair, after all. 

“They must think you’re our weak point,” Shiro said. “Stay alert!”

“Woohoo! I’m not the bad leg!” Hunk cheered. Keith and Pidge snickered over the comms.

“Well, these Galra better get ready for the biggest literal ass-kicking of their lives,” Lance growled. “Let me see your moves, Hunk!”

“My what-?” Hunk squeaked, but Voltron was already bolting forward, rushing the Galra warship. Surprisingly, it worked, and the paladins managed to get past the small fleet of fighter pilots that were buzzing around the main ship, like a swarm of pissed off laser-bees. Lance whooped triumphantly as Keith swung along the hull of the warship with his bayard, slicing it in two.

“Let’s see that strut, bitches!” Lance cackled. Shiro made a disapproving dad-noise at Lance’s language, but Hunk and Pidge cheered with him. Over the comms, Allura and Coran congratulated them on a job well done.

“We should be able to warp you back to the castle, just hang on a tick!” Coran told them. They all managed to do an awkward pirouette, wheeling around to face the wormhole opening, back to the castle.

A familiar flash of light engulfed Voltron as the lions split apart, followed by a second flash as the team entered the wormhole.

“Wait- Paladins! Look out-!” Allura’s panicked voice just barely made it to Laces ears before a deafening screech and a third, blinding flash of light slammed into him and Blue. It pushed him forward, and subsequently, straight into Red and Keith. 

“The wormhole-! It’s collapsing-! The castle- Attack!” Allura’s voice cut in and out through the staticky comm, but it was too late. All five paladins were swallowed by the tunnel, and spat out god-knows-where in the middle of fucking space. Lance desperately tried to move Blue, to get her turned around, something, but the blast had rendered her temporarily paralyzed. He could feel her usual, buzzing presence dim. Frantically, Lance pushed buttons and flipped switches, wishing he knew anything about engineering, like Hunk.

“Brace for an impact!” Keith, whose lion was still tangled up with Blue, barked at Lance. He stopped flipping random switches, and looked up, startled by the proximity of an approaching atmosphere.

“Gah, Blue, it’d be great if you could wake up now,” Lance pleaded, stroking his chair in a sign of desperate comfort. “Like, so awesome of you.”

“About thirty seconds! If you could get off me, Lance-”

“I’m working on it!” Lance snapped, rubbing harder at Blue’s chair.

“Ten seconds!”

“Blue, please-!”

“Five, Four, Three-”

“Please don’t curbstomp Keith to death, he’s really cute,” Lance whispered to Blue, closing his eyes.

-

“Well fuck me sideways and call me Shirley, what in tarnation do we have here?”

“Please only speak English over the comms units.”

“That was English, sunshine.”

“Anata wa machigatte imasuga, watashi wa mada anata o aishiteimasu.”

“Oh my god stop flirting, it’s gross! Pharah, you’re in charge, what do we do?”

Jesse grinned for a second, before holstering his gun and leaning back, surveying the open desert with a stony expression, masking the panic he felt stir in his chest. A gentle thump next to him announced Hanzo’s presence, along with a small puff of desert dust around his ankles. It gave Jesse some small satisfaction to see Hanzo have to squint in the harsh sunlight, but outwardly, he quietly lowered the brim of his hat. 

“Rendezvous at the checkpoint, we must stay together,” Pharah barked over the comms, making Hana groan and mutter something obscene in Korean. What happened to English only over comms? He shook his head, sighing. Hanzo’s head turned to regard him, his stare too harsh for when they were alone.

“What’s eatin’ at you, darlin’?” Jesse mused, not turning away from the vague, robotic form on the horizon. Hanzo tsked, and crossed his arms.

“We should not be compromising the mission for this…” He gestured off into the distance. Jesse hummed noncommittally. Hanzo was right, of course, but he was curious, and there was no harm in a little investigation. Usually.

“I s’pose you’re right, but I’m itchin’ to see what all this is. No way it’s Talon, and no Omnium for miles could spit out a monster that big.”

“Indeed, I am right,” Hanzo sniffed. Jesse chuckled, far too used to the archer’s callous sense of humor. He caught the faintest traces of a grin outlined on Hanzo’s features, and his heart fluttered in a way too undignified for a thirty-seven year old man. 

“What are you two standing around for? Let’s go!” Hana’s comm buzzed just as heavy footsteps fast approached the pair. Sure enough, a hulking pink meka trundled towards them, skidding to a stop barely two feet behind them. Behind her, Pharah hovered in the air like a silent sentry. It was amusing, how different she was as a captain. Jesse could still remember watching Disney movies with her as a teenager.

“We will move with caution. Jesse, Hanzo, you will go ahead to investigate. Hana and I will provide cover. Clear?”

“Crystal,” Jesse rumbled. Hanzo nodded curtly. The group took off, surprisingly stealthy for three soldiers and a giant robot. Hanzo disappeared, Jesse wasn’t sure when, but at some point he disappeared in the few decrepit buildings and shrubs along Route 666.

They reached the giant metallic figures, and Jesse paused, unsure. He glanced behind him at Pharah and Hana for guidance. Pharah remained unreadable, while Hana gave him a little, ‘go on’ motion in her mech. Suddenly, Hanzo was beside him again, tugging Jesse along, toward the twisted robots.

“I do not believe they are omnics,” Hanzo murmured, keeping hold of Jesse’s sleeve as he ran. “My dragons are responding… violently, towards them.”

“I’m gettin’ a bad feelin’ too,” Jesse replied. A thrill of energy was thrumming down his spine, setting his teeth on edge, and making the backs of his eyes ache. Hanzo nodded, stopping abruptly. 

“These appear to be… Animals,” He grunted, looking around in confusion. Jesse glanced up as well, raising an eyebrow. But, sure enough, two metallic faces peered down at the two of them, Dull eyes sending a strange electricity down McCree’s spine. He instinctively shifted closer to Hanzo, his hand grazing the handle of Peacekeeper. “Lionesses,” Hanzo whispered, peering tensely up at the faces.

“Agent Hanzo, Agent McCree, come in. What do you see?” Pharah’s voice startled Jesse, and from the look of it, Hanzo as well. Jesse shook his head, and lowered peacekeeper, which he hadn’t noticed he’d drawn. 

“Agent McCree, reporting. These don’t look like any Omnics I’ve ever seen before.”

“Agent McCree, plea-” Suddenly, Pharah’s voice cut out, and the strange buzzing feeling manifested itself, shorting out the comm units. Hanzo hissed in pain, and plucked the comm from his ear, and after a moment, Jesse did the same. 

“We should return to the others,” Hanzo said lowly, his voice steady but holding an undercurrent of urgency. This time, Jesse was inclined to agree. He instinctively reached out for Hanzo’s hand, and followed him as he slowly backed away, keeping his eyes firmly fixed on the lions.

It was like walking alone at night, with no light and nothing but the feeling of something watching you when you can’t quite watch it back. A feeling Jesse McCree knew a little too well, and knew that it meant disaster. The buzzing feeling began to pulse, sending shoots of static up and down his spine. Beside him, Hanzo gasped, quietly.

“What?” Jesse murmured, his eyes darting away from the lion faces for a split second, just in time to catch Hanzo wince. He turned his head away, and spat onto the ground.  
“It is nothing.” He winced again, and his hand tightened around Jesse’s. “It feels… Burning…”

Jesse bit his lip. Hanzo’s dragons seemed to convulse on his arm. Not good; they were a time bomb ready to explode like this. Screw his bad feeling, the only danger they were in was from themselves. Jesse pulled Hanzo to him, and began to hurry away from the lions. 

“Ah!” Hanzo grunted, because Hanzo Shimada, heir to the Shimada Clan, did not yelp, and suddenly, a huge metal hull shifted, and the two were trapped between a pair of robotic bodies. The electricity began to sting McCree’s skin, like sparks of oil from a pan. 

“Well now,” Jesse muttered, raising peacekeeper slightly. “Ain’t that dandy.”

“We must get out,” Hanzo growled. “They must get out.”

“This is- fuck.” Jesse sighed, looking between Hanzo and the two lions, searching for a plan. His mind seemed too hazy, too full of the infernal buzzing feeling that he couldn’t quite place. 

“I agree wholeheartedly,” Hanzo huffed. “My dragons… They do not like this, and they grow irritated.”

“Y’know, I’m not seein’ a much better option. Maybe we oughta let ‘em poke around?” Jesse recommended. He felt helpless, trapped between the metal monsters and unable to think, while the sparks of electricity singed his skin. Hanzo’s breathing was growing heavier, and Jesse could see sweat beginning to beat along his hairline. He and Hanzo appeared to be up the same river in the same boat.

“No. The shrapnel will cause us too much damage,” Hanzo decided, shaking his head. “This heat is insufferable.”

“Don’t need to tell me twice, darlin’, it’s eatin’ at me too,” Jesse replied. He took a step over to one of the robots, and reached out a hand to touch it, but as he moved, something around the lion began to glow a soft blue color. 

“What in god’s name-” He gasped, but suddenly the lion head shifted, and his feet filled with static, rooting him to the ground. Hanzo shouted his name, but he sounded miles away, and all Jesse could do was stand helplessly, quaking in his boots, as blue light engulfed him and the lion. It’s head bowed before him, and the jaw opened, extending a ramp for him. Slowly, the light faded away, and Jesse still couldn’t move, the static filling him entirely.

“What happened?” Hanzo demanded, suddenly at his side once again. Jesse just blinked, lightheaded from all of the energy leaving him in a great big whoosh. He swayed, and Hanzo’s hand steadied him at the small of his back. 

“I dunno, I went to touch it and-” He made a sweeping gesture, to all of the lion. “Should we… go in?”

Hanzo paused, and slowly, his hand snaked around Jesse’s waist. “That appears to be our only option.”

“I dunno, I don’t so much mind stayin’ here alone with you,” Jesse winked, but the effect was slightly dulled by the way his weight slumped onto Hanzo’s shoulder. Hanzo didn’t reply, just started walking up the ramp from the lion’s mouth, dragging Jesse along with him.

They entered into what looked like a cockpit, cramped and flashing. Jesse stood up, and took a few steps towards the pilot’s seat, Peacekeeper close to his side.  
“There’s a kid,” Jesse groaned, running a hand over his face. This complicated things.

“What?” Hanzo was over in a flash, and stared down at the child slumped over the control panel with a tight jaw and furrowed brows. Jesse gently turned the kid over onto his back, to see him better. His face was partially obscured by his helmet, blue like his robot, but there was no mistaking that he was hispanic, and no older than 18. Fuck.

“We gotta get him outta here,” Jesse moaned. He didn’t even know how they were going to get out of there.

“How do we know he will not compromise us?” Hanzo shot back, instantly.

“He’s obviously gonna compromise us, but we can’t just leave him here to die,” Jesse grunted, pulling the kid over his shoulder.

“How do we know he is not working with the omnics in Null Sector, or Talon?” Hanzo demanded. “We still do not know if these omnics are friendly, and he is undoubtedly working with them.”

“He’s also just a kid,” Jesse pointed out. “C’mon, sweetheart, he’s out cold on his control panel, if we don’t take him in, he may not get up.”

“We may not want him to get up,” Hanzo hissed. Jesse rolled his eyes; So dramatic, all the time. He ignored Hanzo as he pulled the kid up, shouldering his weight. His legs were almost steady again, and he could definitely take this kids pathetic weight (What, did he live off of tap water and saltines?) but Hanzo took half as well, grumbling his disapproval as he did. 

“Wait,” Hanzo snapped suddenly, dumping the kid onto Jesse’s shoulders. He staggered under the weight, but said nothing as Hanzo adopted a defensive stance. Someone else was here, because with Hanzo, there were never any false alarms.

“Show yourself,” Hanzo demanded, slyly slipping stormbow from his shoulder. He was greeted with nothing but silence and the gentle flash of the cockpit. Jesse stayed stock still, eyes sweeping the seemingly empty area from under the brim of his hat. Suddenly, he saw it. A dim shadow, just this side of too dark, hidden beneath a ledge by the chair. 

“Howdy, partner,” McCree drawled, sliding the unconscious kid to one arm and looping the other through a belt loop. Presentation was key, after all. “I reckon you think yourself pretty sneaky there, huh?”

Again, silence, but it didn’t matter this time. Hanzo watched McCree intently out of the corner of his eye, awaiting a signal. Slowly, McCree jutted his chin towards the desk, and the moment Hanzo saw it his face darkened. Adorable, how childishly competitive he got sometimes.

“Callin’ my bluff won’t getcha anywhere, partner,” Jesse continued, ambling slowly towards the ledge. In one swift move, he snapped his leg out, and hit something distinctly human shaped that made a delicate groan when he hit it. 

“‘Cuz I don’t bluff,” McCree finished, pulling Peacekeeper free. “Get up, I know you’re there and I’ve got your buddy and Hanzo’s liable to kill ya if you don’t move.”

“Do not think me so brash,” Hanzo grumbled, quiet enough that only McCree would hear. “We do not have time for your silly god-cop bad-cop routine.”

“Aw, really, sugar? But that’s my favorite part!” Jesse pouted, idly spinning peacekeeper around his index finger. “Alright, enough playin’, get up.” He nudged the body under the ledge again, and in a flash, a hand wrapped around his ankle, and pulled, hard. Luckily for McCree, and unluckily for the hand, it caught a handful of spur, and yelped as it pulled back.

“And y’all say my spurs are useless,” Jesse chuckled, taking a step back. “Alright, sunshine, he’s all yours. But don’t hurt him too much, if you wouldn’t mind.”

“We do not have time for this,” Hanzo growled, and reached down, coming back up with two armfuls of squirming, angry teenager. He was injured, badly, but he still managed to elbow Hanzo in the face, hard enough to bruise. 

“Cease,” Hanzo snarled, seizing the boy’s arm and twisting. He yelped, but didn’t give up. McCree watched with mild interest, admiring the mullet the kid had going for him.

“I wouldn’t test him too much, he’ll break your fingers for talkin’ back too much,” McCree said as Hanzo finally managed to shove the kid’s face into a chokehold. 

“We have no time for this,” Hanzo repeated. “We must return to D.Va and Pharah.”

“Gotcha, darlin’. Just follow me,” He grinned, sliding the unconscious kid onto his back, and leading out of the lion. Hanzo practically dragged his kid by the scruff of his neck, silently bearing the half-hearted struggling. 

When they reached the ground again, the lions once again turned to face them, but this time, they parted, stepping aside to allow Jesse and Hanzo past. From his pocket, Jesse heard Pharah yelling into the comm, and Hana muttering korean profanities. Shit, they’d been gone for too long. Hanzo was right; they had no time.

“Agent McCree and Agent Shimada, second one, reporting in!” Jesse shouted once they were within eyesight of the team. “And we found some friends!”

“Jesse! Hanzo! What- where- nevermind,” Pharah sighed, taking in the sight of her agents and their captives. “We should get to the airship, high levels deadlock activity in the area reported. Do the omnics look dangerous?”

“Omnics…?” The boy in Hanzo’s headlock mumbled, but a swift flex of the forearm made him quiet again. Pharah spared him a confused glance, and continued,  
“Well? Dangerous or safe to leave here, for the time being?”

“Well, it looks like they do need a pilot, but it doesn’t look like they’re in workin’ order right now,” Jesse sighed. “And honestly, I don’t think Deadlock would care much for ‘em. Not really too excited about omnics, if ya catch my meanin’.”

“Alright. Return to the airship, and then, I want to know what the hell happened in there,” Pharah grumbled, and took off, leading the way back to the airship.

“Leave it to you two to bring back civilians on a stakeout,” Hana sighed, and charged after Pharah, leaving Jesse and Hanzo alone. Jesse grinned, and adjusted his load, shooting Hanzo a smug look.

“Race you back.”


	2. Dammit Jim, I'm a Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of lance, a little bit of Keith, and a little bit of everyone else. Where the hell is Hanzo?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the sort of scattered POVs, I'm still trying to establish everything as best I can, and I couldn't find a more cohesive way to do it. Also, I may be late on my next update, I'm going on a trip so I'm not sure I can post it on time. But don't worry, I'll be working on it as fast as possible!

-  
Lance woke up in his favorite way: mostly naked, in a strange bed, and with a beautiful woman leaning over him. 

“Hello, Princess, good mornin’ to you too,” Lance purred, grinning dopily. A snort from the princess and a grunt of disapproval from somewhere behind him; it was more or less what he expected.

It took him a moment to get his bearings, slowly sitting up until his back shrieked in agony and forced him to stop. He looked around, getting twinges of pain in his neck for the trouble, and quickly realized he was in a medbay. But not the castle’s medbay. And that wasn’t Allura. And that metallic green thing wasn’t Pidge. And oh god oh god where the fuck was he oh god-

“Princess is a new one, so I will give you the points for originality,” The beautiful woman chuckled, and at the sound of her voice, Lance immediately calmed down. Ok, pretty girl, mostly human looking, not killing him, all good signs. He watched as she appeared at his bedside, and began looking at his vitals, humming as she did.

“I’ve got more where that came from, too,” Lance grinned, winking. Again, the metallic green suit huffed in irritation, but the pretty lady just snickered again. “If you’re not a princess, then how should I address you, my lady?”

“Dr. Zeigler,” The metallic suit growled, and something about the gruff, accented english was familiar, but Lance couldn’t quite place how.

“Don’t mind Genji, he’s just pouting,” Dr. Zeigler mumbled, her brow furrowing slightly as she scribbled down something on her chart. “May I ask you a few questions? I need to fill in your chart, but there’s not a lot we know about you.”

“My name’s Lance. I’m a Leo, I like long walks on the beach and italian food-” Lance started, but the doctor cut him off with a hand.

“I was thinking more along the lines of your name, age, and place of birth.”

Yikes. Aliens asking him where he lived. Never good. He bit his lip, thinking for a moment. What to say, what to say… Two pairs of eyes bore heavily into him as he fidgeted, trying to think.  
“What planet am I on?” Lance finally blurted out, and immediately wanted to shoot himself with his bayard. Smooth moves, Lance, you sweet-talker, you. They’ll never see past your charismatic charm now.

“Uh… Earth,” Dr. Zeigler replied, poorly concealing her shock behind her clipboard. Genji stood up, and took a step closer, somehow looking suspicious even through a mask.

“What other planet would you be on?” Genji demanded, regarding Lance carefully. Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit-

“I was just making sure. Because I wanna swim in all five of your oceans, babe.”

Nice.

A full second of silence passed before Dr. Zeigler busted out laughing and Genji looked like he wanted to throttle Lance. Phew, crisis averted. He grinned cheekily, praying to god that-  
Wait. He was on Earth? Seriously? But how? Last he remembered he was crash landing and Keith was yelling at him to-

Keith! That mullet-having bastard, where was he? He had to have survived the crash, he just had to, because if he didn’t then that meant he… and Lance would be here alone, with no plan, because Lance never had a plan, but wait, he was on Earth. And that meant he was home, and he knew exactly what to do.

“I need to go to the Galaxy Garrison,” Lance burst, looking intently between Genji and Dr. Zeigler. The doctor blinked in surprise, and Genji regarded him impassively. She gently set the clipboard down, and sat on the edge of his bed, classic bad-news delivery style. Oh god, was Lance dead? Was Keith…

“Lance. I don’t know where you’re talking about,” The doctor said gently, “But you’re not in any position to go anywhere for a while. Do you not remember anything?”

“We should have lead with that,” Genji grumbled, and turned away to return to his seat behind Lance. The Doctor ignored him, focusing bright blue eyes on him. He shifted uncomfortably; how much did he know? How much did they know? He certainly didn’t remember getting here, but he passed out in his lion. For how long though?

“I remember… Crashing,” Lance settled on. Dr. Zeigler nodded, smiling encouragingly. 

“Were you with anybody else, Lance?” She prompted softly. Lance hesitated for a moment, before nodding.

“I was with… My teammate. Keith. We were crashing, and I couldn’t move, and then I hit my head- and now I’m here,” Lance finished, hints of stress finally creeping into his voice. Dr. Zeigler nodded again, and gave him a reassuring pat on the hand.

“Well, do not worry, Lance. You are in good care now. Your friend Keith is safe with our other doctors, healing as well.” 

Lance let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, and slumped back against the pillows. Being back on Earth was already a blessing, but now he was safe, and so was Keith. As soon as he was well, it was back out into space to find Pidge, Hunk and Shiro, but according to his doctor, he couldn’t move, so why not relax a little bit in the meantime?

“Thank you,” Lance breathed, closing his eyes. He was safe, and Keith was safe, probably resting peacefully with other angelic doctors.

 

-

 

“I will not hesitate to pump you full of tranquilizers again, young man.” 

“Fuck you.”

The old bitch with the eyepatch raised an eyebrow at Keith, idly cleaning the barrel of her gun with a rag. She made a soft tsking noise, and set it on the table behind her, rising to her feet in a way far too menacing for a woman in her late sixties.

“Hanzo was right about you, such a nasty young boy,” She sighed. “I had hoped you would prove me wrong, but a mother’s intuition can be fooled, I suppose.”

“The first thing you did was shoot me!” Keith burst, yanking viciously against the leather binding his feet and arms to the bed. His Bayard was across the room with the rest of his gear, and tranquilizers still flooded his bloodstream, congesting his movements. 

“The first thing you did was try to punch Jesse in the face,” The woman shot back. “Honestly, I don’t know why Angela was so insistent on giving you a once-over. Anybody who can give a right-hook that well is perfectly fine, in my opinion.”

“So let me go, you old bitch,” Keith gritted out. The woman shook her head, smiling coyly at Keith.

“That is no way to address your doctor. Please, call me Ana, or Ms. Amari if you want to be formal. But,” She turned away, picking up her sniper rifle once again, “I don’t think that will be an issue with you.”

“Why am I here?” Keith demanded. Ana shrugged flippantly, planting the butt of her rifle on the ground and folded her hands over the mouth, setting back into a faux-casual position.

“Because, Mr. Omnic Pilot, most teenage boys do not hole up in giant lion onmics that fall from the sky,” Ana sniffed. Keith let out a harsh laugh, tugging once again at his binds.

“You’d be surprised,” Keith grunted. Ana’s face remained frozen in a mask of polite passivity, but Keith could sense her growing interest. 

“Tell me, young man, what is your name?”

“Fuck you,” Keith spat again. “Or bite me, if you want to be formal. But I don’t think that will be an issue with you.”

Ana laughed, and waggled her finger at Keith. “I like you, boy, and you are lucky that I do, but don’t try this with Commander Morrison. He’s much less… Humorous than I am.”

“Why am I here?” Keith demanded again. Ana sighed, and shook her head, letting her facade fall. Her face crumpled into a serious scowl, and she shouldered her rifle, looking more imposing than Keith had seen, even as she’d knocked him unconscious from across the heliport.

“Look, boy. You are not in a position to be smart with anybody here, and I am running out of time. Commander Morrison will be here momentarily, and he is not so very… generous, with his information as I’d like him to be. So tell me, what exactly brings you and your lions to the middle of the desert?”

“Y’know, little of this, little of that,” Keith drawled, drawing back into himself as best he could with his arms and legs tied. “In the neighborhood, decided to drop by.”

“And that you did,” Ana sighed. “Well, my time's up. A word of advice for Morrison: If you have no information to share, say nothing. I would hate for that little friend of yours to take a beating for you.”

“My friend- wait,” Keith demanded, but Ana was already walking away, leaving him on the bed. “Where is Lance? What did you do?” Ana said nothing, simply waved over her shoulder as she slammed the door behind her, leaving Keith alone in the bed.

Where was Lance? Was he tied up too? Keith’s stomach flopped at the thought of Lance strung up, waiting to be tortured. He needed to figure out where they were, who these people were, and get out of here, fast. He tugged uselessly against his binds, again, fruitlessly. Dammit, he needed to get out of here, to find Lance, to do something-

A sharp sting stabbed him in the neck, and his whole world seemed to tilt sideways. Blackness clouded the edges of his vision, and it was mere seconds before sleep dragged him from consciousness.

 

-

 

“He’s not talking. He’s done this before,” Ana stated, crossing her arms over her chest. “The only one worse than this was Jesse.”

“What, did you people specialize in child interrogation way back when?” Hana scoffed. Ana, Jack, Fareeha and Jesse all shared a dubious glance, and Hana threw her hands up. “Nevermind, I don’t want to know anymore.”

“It looks like Angela and Genji are gettin’ further,” Jesse mused, pointing out on the monitor where Angela leaned over the other boy’s bed, patting his hand gently. “Wouldn’t ya know it, the shrink’s good at gettin’ information.”

“Well, she also didn’t start out by shooting him,” Hana added. “Look, they’re done, Genji’s coming back.”

The room fell silent for a moment as they watched Genji hurry up the corridor on one of the screens, anticipation heavy. Genji entered the room with a swift bow, and looked back at the monitors.

“Report,” Jack commanded.

“The boy’s name is Lance, and his friend is Keith. He is hesitant to reveal information about himself. Well,” Genji corrected, grimacing slightly, “Important information. He mentioned nothing about where he comes from, but he did ask about something called a ‘Galaxy Garrison.’ They appear to have crashed, as we suspected.”

“Hana, go get Winston and Athena to look up anything related to this ‘Galaxy Garrison.’ FInd out who, where, and what it is,” Jack barked. Hana nodded, and scampered out of the room, her phone already out and searching. Ana stood up, taking her place behind Jack.

“It appears we have two very different personalities here,” She mused. “I suggest we keep them completely separate, in order to gain as much intel as we can. Keep Angela with Lance, or Lucio if necessary, and myself and Jack will handle Keith. No other agents are to come in contact with the two. I will alert Angela to the situation.”

With that, Ana too hurried out the door, leaving Jack, Fareeha and Genji alone. Jesse tipped his hat back, regarding the others plainly, in a way quite unusual for him.

“Are we sure we should be doin’ this, Morrison?” He asked quietly. “They’re just kids, n’ all…”

“They are enemies first,” Jack replied harshly. “We don’t know who these people are, what they’ve done, who they work for, or what they’re capable of. We cannot afford to let them out of our sight until we know their motives.”

“Their motives are they’re dumb teenagers who’re probably scared outta their wits!” Jesse snapped. “Jesus, Jack, listen to yourself! We’re interrogating a seventeen year old!”

“I agree with Jack,” Fareeha cut in. “They were found with those omnics, they could be a threat to us.”

Genji said nothing, even at Jesse’s outraged look. Fareeha and Jack stood their ground. Their harsh, unyielding ground. No compassion, no empathy.. .But then, when had either of them ever been on the other end of one of their interrogations?

“Fine, do what y’all want, but I ain’t helpin’ none when this all goes to hell in a handbasket,” Jesse snarled, and stalked out of the room. Genji followed him, a silent shadow, but Jesse ignored him as well. Seventeen, in handcuffs, in an empty room with nothing but barbed questions… A bit to familiar for his liking.

Gather intel Jesse’s ass, Jack just liked an easy target, and there was no way these kids would end up like Jesse McCree.

 

-

 

“Allura, I’ve got a read on Hunk and Pidge,” Shiro declared, letting out a huge sigh of relief as he did. Allura was instantly by his side, staring up at the locator with huge eyes brimming with thankful tears.

“Oh, wonderful! Coran, lock on and transport them back, immediately!” She shouted. Coran was already on it, furiously punching in coordinates behind them. “Any sign of Lance or Keith?”   
“Not yet…” Shiro mumbled, looking away. Allura just nodded, anxiously biting her lip as the castle scanned once more. “It’s like they just vanished out of thin air.”

“Well, the universe is a big place, you know,” Coran mused. “I’m sure we’ll find them, chin up! It just may take a while for this old hunk of junk to figure out where!” Allura managed a weak smile, but it had already been about a day of Earth time, and absolutely zero sign of either paladin. Shiro was officially worried; he prayed to whatever space deity was out there that Lance and Keith stayed out of trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whew, that's done, anyway. Follow me on tumblr at either @the-artdump or @popcorn-fox ! Yell with me about video games or whatever. I crave V A L I D A T I O N.


	3. The Great Migaytion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> all the boys in one spot, yay!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just got back from traveling and it was A Time. Fun though! Sadly not a lot of time for writing. But here's an update! I'll try to get more regular but I'm a little bit frazzled so don't expect too much from me lol. Enjoy!

One leather bind, three cracked nails and a strained wrist later, Keith was free from his prison. Unfortunately, His armor and bayard were locked up tight, and the door was deadbolted from the other side. He was free, but trapped. Or, he would be, if a very convenient air vent hadn’t been positioned just above arm’s reach over the counter.

With one laborious grunt, Keith prised the grate from the screws, and dropped it on the ground with a huge clattering sound. Perfect, and stealthy, too. It took him a couple tries to heave himself up into the vent, but he chalked that up to tranquilizers still flooding his system, definitely not a lack of upper body strength.

He managed to spider-climb his way up until the vents turned horizontal, and then he paused, wondering where the hell to go. He could wander around until he found a way out, but that would take too long. The best course of action was to go up until he hit the roof, and then climb back down. Hopefully this planet’s air wasn’t toxic, but he didn’t have time to get his helmet. As Lance always said, yolo, right?

Three more spider-climbs and some very tired thighs put Keith one vent away from the roof. He awkwardly crab-walked his way up to the vent, and kicked once, twice, three times, and off popped the vent cover. He didn’t die instantly from a lack of air, or a toxic atmosphere, so Keith counted his blessings. So far: One. 

“You are quite persistent.”

Keith whirled at the infuriating familiar voice, his hands coming up defensively around his head. Instead, the man with only half of a shirt looked down at him from atop an AC unit, arms crossed and surly expression wholly unimpressed.

“Let me go,” Keith growled, his attempt at sounding menacing falling flat from the way his voice shook a little. The man just rolled his eyes, and then slowly closed them.

“I have not taken you captive yet,” He sighed. Keith shrank back, doing his best to ignore the embarrassment that trickled down his back. This man wasn’t so tough… He just got the drop on Keith before because he was injured. Yep, that was the story and he was sticking to it. Still, he hesitated to move with the man still watching him.

“Well? It is your move.” Keith set his jaw. This, he was comfortable with. The air was tense, a fight already coming up, and Keith knew from the other man’s goading that he shouldn’t make the first move. Patience was key.

Silence followed, and the other man did not move either, content to sit with his eyes closed as he awaited Keith’s movement. Nerves grated at the back of Keith’s neck, making him blurt,

“I’m not dumb enough to move first.”

“It is not dumb to move first, so long as your move is not dumb,” The man grunted, sounding mildly irritated. “I suggest not fighting me right now, I have a bad headache and will not exercise the same restraint I did earlier.”

“Well? I’m waiting,” Keith snarked, holding his fists at the ready. 

“So be it.” 

The man slipped off the AC unit, a mask of unbridled fury across harsh features. Almost as scary as Haggar, But Keith had already won against her, and the key word was almost. The man slowly stalked around him like a tiger, prowling. It was incredibly unnerving, the way he seemed to ripple with hidden power… Keith pushed down the fear in his gut, ignoring instincts once again.

“Don’t blink,” The man warned, and jumped back, and suddenly, a bright light and high-pitched ringing sound knocked Keith to the ground, and a heavy weight shoved his face into the metal roof, and another dug into his back.

“What did you do?” He gasped, outraged by the dirty trick.

“I did nothing,” The man intoned. “Jesse flashbanged you.”

“Howdy.” 

Another irritating familiar voice filled Keith’s ears, deep and southern and reminding him of home in a bad way. What, did these two only work in pairs?

“Get off me,” Keith snarled. The man on top of him snorted, and did not get off of him. 

“You stood silently for about three minutes determined not to move, did you think I did not message backup in that time?” The man asked, rather smugly, and Keith growled into the ground, the only response he had that wasn’t a ‘well, yeah.’

“Ah, get off him, sweetheart, I don’t think he’s really fixin’ to run,” Jesse sighed. Haha, incorrect, Keith was definitely planning to run, and he grinned silently into the dirt. Unfortunately, the weight did not press off of him, merely shifted to crush the small of his back into the roof instead of his shoulders.

“I’m quite comfortable here, actually,” The man huffed. “And It is fine repayment for the elbow I took to the face earlier.”

“Whatever rocks your boat, honey.” There was a pause, and the quiet sound of spurs jingling ambled over to Keith, before a shadow fell across his face. “Howdy, partner, the name’s Jesse McCree. Mighty fine to meet you.”

“I’d spit in your face if I could right now,” Keith growled, craning his neck to look darkly up at the cowboy. He just chuckled, and knelt down next to Keith.

“I would too, partner. Hell, I did. Reyes didn’t take to kindly to that one, granted, he deserved every bit of mucus I could hawk at him.”

“Great. Save it, would you?” Keith growled. He wasn’t in the mood to listen to this guy try to coax information out of him by being relatable or whatever. Jesse just hummed, and above him, Keith felt the weight on his back shift back and forth slightly, but he knew better than to try and buck them man off. Great, trapped again, and this time even less comfortably.

“Never did catch your name, partner. Gimme a fake one if you want, or else I’m gonna keep keep callin’ you partner.” Keith paused, assessing the harm in it, before promptly deciding fuck it.

“Keith,” He grunted. After a second, he asked, “I usually like to know the name of the man who pins me to the ground.”

“It is not of your concern,” The man said as Jesse grinned, “Hanzo Shimada, at your service.”

“Fuck you, Hanzo Shimada.”

There was a beat of icy silence, before it shattered at Jesse’s snort. Keith couldn’t help but grin triumphantly into the roof, awaiting whatever punishment Hanzo had for him.

-

Lance wasn’t known for being a particularly good patient at any given moment, of course that may have been in part due to his hatred of standing still, but as soon as Dr. Zeigler stepped out of the room, he was up and out of the medbay in two minutes flat. He was sure that the angelic doctor could take good care of Keith, but he wanted to talk to him, and it didn’t look like he was going to be allowed to get up any time soon.

About five minutes of wandering told him why he wasn’t allowed up; his back and neck hurt like a bitch. Geez, what did he do? 

More importantly, where was Keith? If he were Keith, what would he do? Where would he go? Shit, Lance bit back a groan. Of course Keith wouldn’t stay in a medbay. He’d get up and go as soon as his legs would allow it. Dammit, he could be anywhere, and this place was a maze. Plus, if anybody found him they’d definitely drag him back to his bed. Shit, he was so screwed.  
“Heya! Haven’t seen you around, mate!”

A voice just behind Lance startled him into yelping, and he whirled around indignantly to find the source of the voice. A girl in neon orange leggings grinned at him, waving cheekily. There was no way she’d been there before, or else Lance was going crazy. 

“Hey, hotstuff,” Lance smirked, immediately assuming his usual flirtatious persona. “Haven’t had the pleasure of seeing you around, either.” The girl snorted, and flitted to his other side, rocking back on her heels. She shook her head.

“You really must be new around, huh? You’re cute, love, I’ll give you that one but I’m spoken for.”

“Who’s the lucky man?”

“Emily.”

Whoops. A beat of silence passed. 

The girl snorted, and offered a lopsided grin. “I’m Tracer. Nice to meet’cha!”

“Lance,” Lance offered lamely, taking her hand and shaking weakly. She giggled and saluted, already beginning to jog backwards. 

“Well, Lance, I s’pose I’ll be seein’ you around! I gotta run though, duty calls!”

“Wait!” Lance yelped, suddenly nervous at the perspective of being alone again. “Do you know- Where’s the roof?” She paused, staring at him blankly.  
“The… Roof?”

“Yep. The roof.” If there was one place that Keith would go to brood it was definitely up there. What an emo. Tracer snorted at him, and pointed at the ceiling.

“Well, I’d imagine it’s up there, mate. Be careful though, the doors up there are a bit finicky with the locks sometimes. Don’t go setting off any alarms!” She darted off, faster than Lance was reasonably sure a normal human could go. He sighed, and slapped his hand over his face. Where’s the roof? Obviously it’s up, dipshit!

Lance groaned, and hustled down the hall, as fast as his aching body would allow, this time searching for a stairwell. It took about ten minutes but he managed to slip all they way up to the top floor, unbothered by anybody else. He caught a glimpse of someone through a doorway, but he ran away before they could see him. Lance was lucky with Tracer; anybody could make him go back to the medbay if they caught him out of bed.

He made it to a doorway, aptly labelled ‘roof’ in big, block lettering. He felt like even more of a dick for asking about it, now. With a deep breath, he made to push open the thick door, only to find it was already slightly ajar. Score, Keith was definitely here.

...And here he was. Lance gawked at the sight of two grown men leaning over Keith’s prone body, uncomfortably close and touching him a little bit too much. Lance could feel himself turn red. 

“Am I interrupting something?” He demanded, pettiness turning his tone sharp. The two men’s head whipped around, surprise one one’s face and irritation on the other’s. “It’s fine, I can come back later when you’re finished.”

“No, Lance- Wait!” Keith shouted. “Don’t- Help me!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me on tumblr @popcorn-fox and give me some sweet validation by leaving a comment or kudos!

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on tumblr @popcorn-fox and shout with me about stuff


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